Wine News: The 10 commandments of wine tasting

"Wine -- you love it, and you want to drink it.

If you're planning to visit the more than 25 local wineries that will be open today through Monday during the Memorial Day tasting tours, you need to be prepared.

In Grade A Queen Anne Thompson's words, don't be an idiot. If you are new to wine tasting, there are certain rules by which you need to abide.

If you don't, the best you can hope for is that people will know you are a newbie, feel pity and turn away from you in disgust. At worst -- you would be amazed at how easily corkscrews end up planted into people and how it ALWAYS looks like an "accident."

So read and memorize these wine-tasting commandments, (thinking of Charlton Heston playing Moses and reading them may help you to get in the right spirit -- because we are deadly serious).

I. Thou Shall Have a Designated Driver

If you are a smart, sensible person, then you already know to bring someone along who doesn't drink.

However, if you are the kind of jerk who doesn't always let common sense prevail, remember this -- the cops also know it's Memorial Day weekend, and they will be out in droves looking for brain-dead people like you. Also, drivers should remember you will be dealing with narrow, twisty roads and driveways, so for the love of all that is holy, slow down. And leave the obscene Hummer limos at the rental place. They sicken us."

Full article here.

May 28, 2006

Wine News: The 10 commandments of wine tasting